任务型阅读
A
conversation with a good listener is like a good meal—we walk away feeling satisfied
and happy. Here are 4 ways to make your conversation partner
feel like you're fully tuned in to their personal radio station.
Making
your conversation partner feel safe starts with two things: an open mind and keeping
judgment to yourself. Just as immersing(沉浸) yourself
in a novel requires suspension of disbelief, immersing yourself in listening requires
suspension of opinions or advice. While judgments may appear into your head, set
them to the side.
Ask
questions to follow your natural curiosity.
When
you're interested, ask questions. Ask for examples. Ask for details. Following your
natural curiosity by asking questions not only shows you are listening and interested,
but almost always produces an interesting story.
Listen
with your whole body.
In
many a kindergarten classroom, teachers emphasize something called "whole body
listening". It goes like this: use your eyes to watch nonverbal(非语言), your brain to think about what is being said, your heart to feel emotions
and keep the rest of your body quiet to show respect. But many of us lose it over
time, especially as life gets busy. The result? We often try to multitask while
listening.
Validate
(使生效) with simple phrases.
Keep
in your back pocket some validating words and phrases to show you've heard someone.
"Of
course." "That makes sense." "Naturally." "Clearly."
"For sure." In conversation, combining those little phrases:
"Of course you feel that way." or "That makes total sense."
doesn't necessarily convey agreement, but it does convey something even bigger:
acceptance.
A. Create safety.
B. Devote yourself to listening.
C. It's appealing to talk about
your own experience.
D. We half-listen while getting
things done or staring at a screen.
E. Think like a journalist and
ask what, when, where, why or how.
F. But being a good listener goes
way beyond just not interrupting or nodding your head.
G. All of these statements confirm
a person's experience or feelings as worthy and accepted.
答案:【1】F【2】A【3】E【4】D【5】G